When Parents Disagree: How to get on the same page without anyone “winning” or “losing”

Claire Lerner, LCSW

Marriage is hard enough. Adding kids to the mix brings a lot of joy but also more complexity as parenting requires making countless decisions each day about what kids eat, how to get them to sleep, how much screen time to allow, etc. Not to mention the biggie: what the rules, limits and consequences will be for inappropriate behavior (of which there is a lot in the early years.)  

Some couples are fortunate to share similar approaches on childrearing issues. But many parents experience conflict rooted in the fact that they have different perspectives about how to raise kids based on their own upbringings, beliefs and values, and expectations for their children. This kind of tension between parents can have negative effects on children (not to mention the marriage) in several ways: